Another Day in the Life of "Benjamin"

Hello everyone!! Sorry, it's been a looooong time, but I thought I would post my journal entry from Friday (I wrote it today, but the events are yesterday's), as it marks a pretty good snapshot of how my life is and how my project is doing.  Hope you enjoy it :)

Today was interesting. Because my planner is out of pages I wasn't able to plan today on paper. Nevertheless, late Thursday night I was able to contact Father Matthews again and plan an interview with him for this morning (Friday). So 8:30 saw me attending their morning prayers service, and Father Matthews seemed happy to see me (“Is it Ben or Benjamin? I like the name Benjamin...”). He had me sit in the stall next to him and showed me when to speak the verses in Psalms and recite the prayers for the fifteen minute service, and the only other person in the chapel was another woman who also helps run the church. I had been to a similar meeting before, but I think this time it was better because Father Matthew treated me like a friend, not just another visitor. After it was over, we made our way back to Father Matthew's office and started what would end up being an hour-long conversation.

Father Matthews is a very thoughtful, careful, and yet simple man, and I think he relished the opportunity to share his life and feelings about the church and Christianity with someone else. Our conversation lasted a bit more than an hour, and although I really liked listening to him, I will have to do better about guiding the conversation next time toward the topics that are most important for my study. For most of the interview I think I was just a little too happy to be interviewing :-P Before we started the interview I wrote this about him while he was in the other room finishing off an email:

Father Matthew is the real thing. I feel that if he had lived half a century ago he would have been equally comfortable and suited for the calling as a priest in a traditional Christian church. His clear singing voice for the ancient hymns, his amiable way with people, his sense of humor that manages somehow manages to be both dry and warm at the same time, and his sincere concern toward his parish uniquely qualify this man for his position in the Church of England. At age 44 and standing at around 5’10”, his receding grey hair and penetrating eyes give him the undeniable look of a leader even while his manner retains a distinctly common touch.

Although I was surprised to hear him swear once or twice during our conversation (and perhaps I shouldn't have been), overall he seemed a very good and sincere man. He isn't terribly pleased with the status quo in his church, with numbers declining each year and society as a whole drifting away from regular church attendance. I will always remember the ways he spoke when he talked about his son (“the apple of my eye”, as he put it), nor the way that he described how lost he would feel if he didn't believe and trust in God.

As we walked out at the end of the interview he turned to me and said with a smile, “Now it's time for me to go and play the piano. Yes, I'm taking piano lessons – that's what happens when you reach your mid-life crisis and need something to do!” I laughed and returned that my mom had started taking Spanish classes recently, now that she had more time on her hands, and as he opened the front door he told me that I needed to come back and that he would find some other individuals for me to interview who were older members of the church. I was very happy to say yes!

The rest of the day can be summed up like this: three Avatar episodes with Richard, scripture study, a lesson with the missionaries and a wonderful black woman named Carol, dinner, choir practice, and latin dance party at Kennington

Oh, and here are some recent photos :)

 Squirrel at Hyde Park :)

It's the Brown cousins in London!!

 Trip to the Natural History Museum

Getting ready to watch Henry V at the Globe

Let's face it: the standing tickets are cheaper

Muslim Mosque I saw in the neighborhood by the Indian Market

Journal Entry #32 - 4/4/12

So I've been thinking of a few more questions to ask people. I've been contemplating the extremely private nature of many people in Great Britain. I happened upon this website the other day, and I was thinking about how I need to do better about being punctual. It's less of a "deciding to be late" problem as much as a "I have too much to do, therefore I can't justify being early" problem. In any case, being in London may raise the marginal benefit of being early a bit for me, and perhaps help me overcome my bad habit.

About the slower decision-making process than in the United States, I think that's an interesting one. I'm trying to decide if Brazilians are faster or slower than Americans. Maybe I haven't been around Americans enough since I've been back to know. However, I think Brazilians are pretty slow at making decisions too. I think they're better at faking that they've made a decision than actually making the decision. I've had a lot of people in Brazil tell that they were going to do something and I was dead certain when they said it that they didn't mean it. In America, I think people are a little more prone to tell you straight out if they're going to do something or not. And I think Brazilians like to put of decision making. Maybe that's what this man means when he says that "Decision-making is slower in England than in the United States." In terms of my interviews, I'll have to keep that fact in mind. I may not find anyone in London who will be willing to do an interview with me after only knowing me for a short time. It may take individuals I meet a while to decide that they want to help me.

I was thinking about ways that I might go about just getting the pulse of the population when it comes to religion. If I did succeed in starting up a conversation with someone, either at a museum or at a park (which isn't likely, given how private the British are said to be), how would I turn the conversation to the topic of religion? Undoubtably, they will ask what I'm doing in England. If I tell them I'm studying religion, they may not want to talk about it, since it's not exactly one of those topics you speak about in casual conversation. But if I was to ask something like "You know, the UK isn't near as religious as it used to be," maybe some people will just open up about what they think about it. The essential part here will be holding their attention on the topic for enough time to make it interesting to them too. If they like me and find my conversation amusing or entertaining, there's a chance they might just let me call on them again to do an interview. Just a chance though.

Journal Entry #30 - 3/30/12

While I'm thinking about it, I wanted to brainstorm a few more questions that I will ask people during interviews that I will be doing with them. I had to explain my London project to a friend today, and it's funny how trying to explain your project forces you to make sense of it better than you have before.

So, previously, these the topic of my questions have considered recent statements by the two big camps in religious matters in the UK - at least in the public eye: David Cameron's "We are a Christian country" statement from his December 2011 speech, and a small paragraph published by the British Humanism Association on their website advocating a secular state and the freedom from religion. In addition, I have a question that addresses the large decrease in affiliation with Christian churches by individuals in the United Kingdom as surveyed on the British Social Attitudes survey, asking whether this trend is a positive thing or a negative thing for the country, and another question that cites various studies that have been done that connect religious belief and participation to positive social factors as well as well-known criticisms of religion--the question here will be whether the person sees the net effect of religion as positive or negative.

Now, with respect to these questions, I think some people that I will talk to will have a hard time expressing their real feelings with me. I think they'll probably be fishing around in their responses trying to see what kind of an answer I want from them. I think almost everyone knows that this topic is a pretty hot issue, and nobody really goes around without an opinion on it one way or another. They probably expect that 1) I strongly support religion, or 2) I don't support religion at all, or I support my religion but not others, etc, and they will want to color their responses according to what I seem to want to hear. If they find out I'm very religious myself (which they must if I introduce myself properly, and do not lie, which I won't....because I'm religious and don't believe in that sort of thing....) they will probably try to say things that are positive about religion and religious experience, even if they may have doubts or misgivings personally about it. When they find out that I'm religious, they'll almost definitely take that to mean that I would prefer them to say something positive about churches, or that decreasing religiosity is a bad thing. That does create a real problem, because I must admit that, to some extent, I would like them to say that decreasing religiosity is a bad thing, but I want them to say it if they are going to say it honestly. I'm perfectly alright with them saying that decreasing religiosity is good thing or a neutral thing, as long as that is their honest opinion. I really don't want them to say it's a good thing, only because they think I want them too, when they really don't feel that way at all.

Helping people express how they really feel will depend in large measure on how I conduct each interview. I've noticed that when you ask a question where the answerer feels afraid to say what they really think, they often won't say what it is they are feeling, or they may even say something they don't believe just to save face or to avoid causing offense. I have to project the feeling of someone who would gladly hear the most scandalous and terrifying opinions about religion and not get upset, as long as the person is telling the truth. That's why I've tried to include opinions from both sides of the issue in my questions. I hope that by quoting those who have publicly expressed their opinions on the subject, from both sides of the matter, people I interview will hear an opinion that resonates with them, and open up about their feelings. That's hard, and on second thought it may even be counterproductive, because if I'm trying to fit people's opinions into pre-packaged containers it's not likely that I'm going to get any original material from these interviews, and that's what they are all about. So, although I need to be balanced in my interviewing, I also need to create an environment in the interview where people will express their feelings about religion, even if it's completely different that what I've heard before. It may take some very good observation to sense when what individuals really feel isn't what they're hearing front the two camps that I'll be mentioning, and some real conversational skill to allow that person to open up about their actual feelings without feeling pressured or uncomfortable.

There's a lot of factors to consider...maybe I should practice doing more interviews before I go?

Journal Entry #26 - 3/16/12

Watching this 26 minute video from the "7 Billion Others" project website really made me think a lot about people. I watched the video because I wanted to see and hear more about how normal, everyday people think and believe about God. I've been doing so much reading lately, and a lot of my sources have been printed sources. However, focusing only on what is printed about his topic - attitudes toward religion, and it positively or negatively affects people's lives - does have a strong selection bias. Only the inteligencia puts their thoughts to print. What about the old man next door, the woman in South Sudan, the young man from China? Well, the young man in China might have a blog, but I don't think the old man will (unless he's an outlier, haha). While I am sure these people think deeply about religion and their belief in God, rarely do we get to hear it. I suppose there's not much of a demand for that kind of material, and only organizations like the Goodplanet Foundation that create projects like 7 Billion others actually provide it. That being said, it was remarkable to watch the movie because the voice of the person asking the question is never heard. The camera is often placed so close to the face of the person, and if feels like they are speaking right to you.

I'm the kind of person who likes--too much--to interject, to ask additional questions, to clarify certain points, and to direct a train of thought. I know that I cannot do that while I'm in London interviewing people about how they feel about religion and how it affects them and society, and how increasing secularization might be affecting them, for good or for worse. Religion is a very sensitive topic, with strong feelings and fervent beliefs. I will have to learn to listen more. I'll have to become good at those silent prompts and repeating what others say instead of trying to direct them a certain way. The results are more natural that way, I think; I imagine the opinion-coloring influence that I might have, as an interviewer, on their responses will be lessened if can just hear each person out.